One thing that I dread is when someone asks me after a weekend (let’s not get started on long weekends), “what did you do this weekend?”
“Umm, nothing, just chilled.”
then they’ll say something like, “yeah that’s the best.”
Most people are busy enough to agree with me that having an idle weekend alone is absolutely the best! But there’s no way these people spend every weekend like this whereas I spend EVERY weekend like this.
I am ashamed of it, a little bit, especially when I was in grad school. I developed an irrational fear of going outside after moving to Virginia – but eventually I got used to the sounds of guns going off once in a while.
Even now, being a person that has somehow evolved to a person with a full time job, I spend most of my time alone and savour the few weeks a year where I get to spend that time with family. I live far away from my family and I wish I didn’t.
Recently I became obsessed with Bbogaeng’s instagram account. They photograph and document their daily lives, the food that they eat, the furniture they acquire and the trips they go on. I am obsessed with beautiful home life. Bbogaeng’s home is by no means fancy. I recognize a lot of IKEA furniture and brands that most people can afford. this isn’t a life style blogger that displays opulence, it’s down to earth and lovely and cozy and realistic.
On their blog, they described themselves to be a home-holic. They are addicted to their home.
I thought that was the perfect description. I am a home-holic too. I love my home even though I pay too much rent and is a bit worried about the heating bill. I love my home, I love my home more than most bars and conversations. I love my home and my TV programming and my pajamas and that I have everything I need within reach.
As I age inevitably, I’ve come to a lot of realizations about myself. I’ve become more at ease with myself and it’s making my life easier. I care less about what other people say and what they think about me. I am what I am and I like what I like. I don’t really care if I get in trouble or cause trouble and I am probably a huge bitch – well whatever, that’s for another day.
And I really like staying home! It’s fine to not go out! Especially in the winter time! It’s fine to be at home! As much as I want!